by Solange Lopes | Mar 11, 2015 | Career
feedback – Photo credit: modeming.com
In most professional environments, there’s receiving feedback, and then there’s receiving feedback as a woman. Like getting diagnosed with a condition you actually understand and know how to remediate, versus being given some vague, ambiguous professional sentence you can’t actually put a finger on, never mind get a clear take-away from. Something that would include general, fuzzy words like “bossy”, “emotional”, or even “abrasive”.
I remember coming out of the first of what I called the “ambiguous” series of performance reviews I ever received. There I was, my performance review in hand, scratching my head, with a faint idea of what I was to do now, and a strong sense that this was more personal than professional. I was told to be less “emotional” and more “aggressive”, yet not so much so that I would become abrasive. And to take more initiative but not so much that it wouldn’t let others’ work shine too. Of course, being a woman of color with all the associated stereotypes only made matters more complicated. Ok…
Evidence clearly shows high-achieving men and women are described in a different manner in performance reviews. Regardless of the reviewer’s gender, women tend to receive more critical reviews than their male counterparts, and told to basically “tone it down”. Generally, women are criticized more for personality than actual performance. Among other words that were rarely found in men’s reviews, was the word “abrasive“. And apparently, men are not too fond of giving women feedback either.
As you start and progress through your career, what no one tells you about receiving feedback as a woman at work is very often, you’ll be left puzzled. Very often, you’ll walk of that room feeling blind-sided and a bit surprised, which should never happen during a performance review. And you may very well be tempted to start putting your personality and abilities in question…
Awareness is key to not only understanding this bias, but working around and against it at the same time. Don’t allow it to disarm or destabilize you, and while you’re at it, tell another woman…
Have you faced subtle or outward gender bias in your performance reviews?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Mar 10, 2015 | Career
Photo credit: madamenoire.com
I remember this newly promoted young woman telling me once: “Watch, now that I’m promoted, I’ll never be invited to informal team lunches again.” And right, she was. As she settled in her new tenure, the invites lessened, and so did the Instant Message pings going around for informal happy hour. On the other hand, the pressure to compete with the men in similar higher-up positions increased.
All of a sudden, this woman who had worked so hard to earn her professional success, was being shunned exactly because of it…And instead of rejoicing over her newfound success, she was starting to question if it was even worth it.
According to this recent study, women in power positions at work are more likely to suffer from depression. The opposite is true for men. Despite achieving seemingly better socio-economic advantages, including more money, better education, which are also linked to better health, women in powerful positions in the workplace tend to suffer from negative stereotypes, discrimination, prejudice, lack of support, and competitive pressures. Additionally, the fact many a woman may perceive a trade-off between power at work and at home, may put female higher-ups in a constant limbo between professional and family obligations. So how can women navigate professional success without letting it impact them negatively?
1. Understand the bias exists. Both the organizations and the women in it need to understand there is a real bias against women in power. It has existed since the beginning of times, and most likely will persist despite our best efforts. I know some people with the best of intentions who have bias. Being aware of it can make all the difference between spotting an organizational problem, and internalizing it as a personal flaw.
2. Work with what you’ve got! Once women and organizations alike understand the problem is the deeply ingrained bias in cultures and people, they are better able to navigate the resulting situations. For instance, many women tend waver in their approach to authority as they fear being authoritative does not match the expectation around women being cooperative and friendly. Working around these expectations can help not only lessen them, but also introduce newer, more realistic and effective ones.
3. Seek support! Any women in a position of power is likely to face gender-related bias at work, along with the associated challenges. As we look around at successful women who’ve paved the way to success, one common point among them is mentorship. A mentor will help you find and apply strategies to circumvent bias-related issues in the workplace. If nothing else, their support will help you keep on keepin’ on when all you want to do is “lean out”…
More power, more problems? Do you think power is bad for women?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Mar 6, 2015 | Career
Photo credit: http://zoeyryanthoughts.com
Once in the middle of busy season in Public Accounting, I went to work wearing two different shoes. It’s not even that I could have gotten confused because they looked alike, or had the same shape, or I had any alcoholic beverage before going to work (which by the way is a serious no-no). The explanation was simple, I was exhausted, stressed, and on the brink of losing my sanity.
Staying sane at work is important. Work will drive you crazy at times, maybe even most of the time, what with unfair office politics, competitive co-workers, rude colleagues and general professional annoyances on the daily. And you may very well be caught wearing different shoes, or applying make-up on just half of your face, unless you consciously decide not to lose, and leave, your mind at work:
1. Keep your cool! The average person faces at least 30 crisis a day, most of them occurring in their workplace. That should give you enough perspective to keep your cool. Crisis is part of work, and the first rule to address it is to stay calm. So take a bathroom break, inhale deeply, close your eyes, do whatever you need to keep calm in the face of stressful situations at work!
2. Get out of your head! I’m a creative person, so I’m really good at making up stuff in my head. When stressful situations come up, I already have a demonic plot filled with imaginary scapegoats and traps all ready in my busy brain. The result: more stress, an increased bad mood, and the inevitable chocolate day-long binge. My advice: get out of your head, and look at the facts straight in the eye instead of worsening it all in your head. And oh, lay off the chocolate too…
3. Tune the drama out! My husband has this mental tuning-out technique he applies whenever I start going into “freaking out” mode. It’s so effective I don’t even realize he doesn’t hear a word of my ranting, and comes out of the whole episode totally unscathed and sane. Create your own mental tuning-out technique at work. Whether it’s the latest earphones, a no-fail excuse every time your gossiping co-worker starts talking, or the perfect response to your insulting colleague, keep doing whatever you can to tune out the drama.
4. Laugh it off! Nothing like a good, hearty laugh to lighten up the mood. Watch an episode of The Office, picture your manager with two heads and bulging eyes, whatever you need to do, but just have a giggle!
5. Leave work…at work! Do your best to solve issues and remediate unsolved differences at work while you’re…at work! Don’t trail any negative professional baggage home. Scientists agree picturing a closed door when you leave the office helps you find closure at the end of the day. So close that door, let it go, life goes on…
How do you preserve your sanity at work?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Mar 2, 2015 | Career |
Photo credit: http://www.girlsbasics.com
A great manager once told me “You’ve got to work with gusto!”. Showing up to work (especially on Monday mornings after a major snow storm), with the biggest smile on your face, can seriously feel like a new form of tyranny at times. Yet, a pep in your step and a smile on your face may very well prove to advance your career more than stellar performance. Better yet, under stressful job interview circumstances, a healthy dose of enthusiasm can bring you on top in a tight race.
According to a January 2015 Gallup poll, it appears only 31.5% of U.S. employees were engaged at work in 2014, with millenials coming in as the least engaged generation. Gallup’s definition of an engaged employee is one who is “involved in, enthusiastic about and committed to their work and workplace”.Let’s keep in mind this level of engagement is the highest since 2000 when Gallup first began measuring this performance indicator.
A 2013 Harvard Business School survey on employee engagement found 72% of respondents believe employee engagement has a direct link to high performance. In other words, the more employees are engaged, the more successful they are, and the better off the company’s bottom line. Basic, right?
This is all to say your employer wants you to show enthusiasm and passion at work. Whether you feel the latter or not may matter to you, but not so much to your boss. Sounds unfair, and even bordering on oppression? Maybe…Yet it’s the reality in most workplaces.
So if you happen, like most people, to be chained to the necessity of earning a living to do things like pay your rent or eat food, do you have to pretend to love your job even when you don’t? Well, you may just have to, or avoid that “cheery voice required” customer service job…
Do you feel being enthusiastic is a (forced) pre-requesite to success at work?
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Mar 1, 2015 | Career |
Dr. Maya Angelou – Photo credit: huffingtonpost.com
Happy Sunday!
Hope everyone is enjoying their week-end, and welcoming the month of March, and hopefully the beginning of Spring. Not that we don’t enjoy the snow, but we’ve just about had enough here in the Northeast…And as you’re peeking out your window looking for the first signs of Spring, here are the news that made us smile, cringe, and shake our heads this week:
- In beautiful news this week, and as an inspirational ending to Black History Month, one of my favorite authors, speakers, actresses and equality champions of all times Dr. Maya Angelou is to be honored with her own US postal stamp. And in homage to this “grande dame”, Huffington Post lists 10 things you didn’t know about Maya Angelou’s incredible life;
- In other beautiful news, The Root reveals the Senate Panel’s vote to approve Loretta Lynch to become the first African-American woman US Attorney General;
- Still in smile-inducing news, Her Agenda reveals Facebook and Linked In are teaming up to launch a new college program to empower women in tech. By the way, check out this Smart Asset‘s listing of the best cities for women in tech too;
- In other tech news, the FCC voted to pass the Open Internet Order, aka net neutrality rules, and Lifehacker tells you what it really means for you;
- In an encouraging bid for women everywhere, Business Insider shows women’s wages have been up for the past 35 years, while men’s have been flat. Now we just need both to equalize, please and thank you…
- Speaking of wages, New York Mag celebrates the minimum wage raise for tipped workers in NY, while Fortune writes about Walmart pledging $100 million to boost jobs;
- Harvard Business Review charts up what millenials really want from work, across the world, while Business Insider looks at how they completely change the economy. Whoa!;
- Forbes found out the key to productivity is indeed not in your mornin’ joe, or the next productivity system (read about this new productivity method though), it’s actually getting out of the office. Just don’t do this when working from home;
- In case running a multi-billion dollar company is up there on your to-do list, Fast Company shares a few secrets from women who are doing it day in and day out;
- In fashion news, Inc. lists 6 fashion week trends you can wear to work and not look like you fell off the runways. Also, check out some of the major work trends we saw on the Fall runways, here, here and oh there too…
- If you’re looking forward to your next dentist appointment more than you’re looking forward to work, Ask A Manager discusses managers organizing “fun” at work;
- Introverts be happy! Finally, it’s been proved more networking is bad for women, and Harvard Business Review tells you all about it;
- In juicy bits, Fortune MPW invites you to meet the new trophy husbands, and don’t we love it;
- Last but not least, the head scratcher of the week, heck, make it the month, what color is #TheDress? The Wrap has a confirmation from the designer’s mouth, but we’re still puzzled as to how that made it to front news…Anyhoo…
Happy Sunday y’all!
The Corporate Sis.
