by Solange Lopes | Mar 26, 2017 | Start Your Business |
“You don’t have to have it all figured out before you dive in” – Lisa Jakub
And so started this’ year’s Lady Project summit, which I had the pleasure of attending for the first time this past week-end in Providence, RI. And all I can say is ah-mazing! From the emotional opening keynote by writer Lisa Jakub, to Governor Gina Raymondo’s empowering address, to the amazing workshops and closing keynote by the inspiring Rhonesha Byng, it was all in all an incredibly powerful experience!
Being my first summit of the kind, I wasn’t sure what to expect. Neither was I prepared for the onslaught of positive, enlightening feminine energy channeled throughout the entire event..Held at the Veterans Memorial Auditorium, aka the Vets, in Providence, RI, the summit gathered over 300 women from all over the country, from various careers, businesses and life paths.
Lisa Jakub, Author and Lady Project Summit 2017 Keynote Speaker
“We are so much more than our work, marital status, dress sizes…“- Lisa Jakub
In a deep heartfelt and emotional keynote, the writer took us along her personal journey from being a successful child actor to quitting the Hollywood jungle in her twenties to become a writer. In her enlightening speech, she shed the light on becoming our more authentic selves, finding purpose in the mess, and demystifying the stigmas of anxiety and depression. As I listened to her, I felt the weight of all the societal pressures towards women in particular, and people in general, lift up. We all face the fear of showing up as our most authentic selves, whether it’s at home or in life. Sometimes, all it takes is one brave person who has enough courage to expose what most of us go through to give us permission to be all we can be. And Lisa did just that…
The opening keynote was followed by an electrifying address from RI Governor Gina Raymondo, showing her support for the Lady Project. One her phrases in particular caught mine and the audience’s attention: ” There are only four female governors in America. We must stay in the game.” In a few well-chosen words, she reminded us that as women we not only need to stay the game, but own it. One of the most powerful examples she gave of changing young girls and women’s perspectives is that of the “Governor for a day”, whereby young girls are picked through an essay contest to shadow her for a day. This reminds us of our responsibility to give young girls and women sources of inspiration and faith in the possibilities that lie ahead of them…
RI Governor Gina Raimondo – Lady Project Summit 2017
A series of workshops ensued, from professional, career-oriented workshops, to writing and PR ones, among others. One of my personal favorites were the “Plan Your Pivot: Changing Careers without Scrapping everything you’ve worked for“, led by the impressive Adrian Granzella Larssen. She inspired the audience by telling her own story of pivoting careers, and offered various effective strategies to change careers by leveraging all the skills, talents and experiences we bring to the table.
Another one was around increasing our social media visibility, led by Appleseed Communications founder Ashley Crouch. The session was a highly informative medley of PR success strategies and media examples, providing an excellent blueprint for small business owners.
Ann Shoket, Author, The Big Life
“Your squad is those women who help you succeed.” Ann Shoket, Author & Bad Ass Babe-in-Chief, “The Big Life”
If you’ve never been in one of Ann Shoket’s workshops or dinners, you must! After attending one of her Bad Ass Babe dinners in Providence the evening before, I had the pleasure of being part of the lunch workshop she led during the summit. Hearing Ann talk about the big life she describes in her book, from having a strong career, a passionate side hustle, to a supportive squad, it seemed possibilities are indeed endless for women.
One of the key distinctions she made, and which made me rethink the meaning of what a squad really is, is that your squad doesn’t have to be your group of besties. These are women who push you, empower and inspire you to be your best self and to reach for your dreams. So many of us need to have this, the real squad, not just the “let’s grab a drink and gossip” girls. But the women who lift us up, push us forward, and propel us towards our best lives and careers…
Rhonesha Byng, HerAgenda’s Founder
“When your potential meets exposure, you explode“. Rhonesha Byng, founder of HerAgenda.
Although the day had been all kinds of amazing, I couldn’t wait for the closing keynote of the day. I’ve been a longtime fan of Rhonesha Byng and an avid follower of HerAgenda, the media platform she started at only 16. Watching and listening to her, I not only saw a media powerhouse, but a strong, proud, successful Black woman giving us all the example of what is possible for women to achieve and beyond.
One of the key points of her speech for me touched to our need to champion women, so we can all be in the rooms where decisions are being made and change is being effected. The rooms where our voices need to be heard. For our potential to be seen, we need this exposure. We need to enter those rooms. And we also need to leave the door open for other women to enter those rooms, and let their voices be heard.
Yet the high note of her address occurred when she spoke of her young Black and Latino girls missing in DC because not enough attention’s being paid to their disappearances. It was a wake-up call she illustrated by sharing her own personal story of escaping abduction. Her transparency, vulnerability, as well as her incredible power and influence, kept the room barely breathing. She taught us all a lesson in determination, resilience, but also in sharing our stories, our power, our platforms to effect change and champion other women.
After a well-deserved standing ovation, Rhonesha Byng left a room bursting with hope, power, and motivation, as we went on to toast to a day to remember…
So thank you the Lady Project for an astounding time! See you next year…
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Mar 21, 2017 | Career
I get so excited about Spring! Nothing like the weather getting warmer, flowers blooming, and colorful fashion coming out, to put a pep in your step and a smile on your face! Plus some fun fashion in your closet, that you can rock from desk to dinner in a cinch!
While I’m not always into trends, I have to admit that Spring fashion trends are usually some of my favorites to wear to work. Here’s the not-so-low lowdown on these and how you can style them for major workwear impact:
Floral pencil skirt – Photo credit: shop style.com
Florals
Call me a flower child but florals (mot your grandma’s kind though) make me all fashion-happy…For spring at work, I prefer fresh floral dresses in classic cuts like this Donna Morgan flutter sleeve dress from Nordstrom. I also love this Lauren Ralph Lauren floral-print trapeze dress from Macy’s.
In different styles, I like this Victorian ruffle blouse from Target, and this midi pencil skirt, also from Target. And seriously, how elegant is this floral pleat back pencil skirt?
Nautical Stripe tee – Photo credit: shopstyle.com
Stripes
Stripes are back in, and I couldn’t be happier! Love the Frenchy chic appeal of this classic trend that never really goes away, and can be declined in so many different styles…Like this Halogen stripe pencil skirt from Nordstrom, perfect to pair with pretty much everything! This stripe seersucker top is also great to pair with any bottom from the office to the week-end.
But my absolute favorite is nautical stripes! I love this Umgee nautical tee from Shoptiques, which is a great basic to have on hand! If you’re in the mood for splurging, this Carolina Herrera sleeveless dress in navy and white from Neiman Marcus is a lifetime investment.
Petal Frame Pendant – Photo credit: shopstyle.com
Neons
Ok, you may be reading this and thinking: “Who in their right mind would sport neons at work?” Ok, I hear you, walking into work dressed in neon from head-to-toe can be a bit much! But I’m a big fan of breaking up a monochromatic or dark outfit with a bright pop of neon. Like with this adorable and spring-perfect luxurious cashmere travel wrap from White+Warren, or with this subtle but not so subtle Alexis Bittar petal frame pendant.
Akris suit – Photo credit: shopstyle.com
Not so-neutral Neutrals
One of my fave Spring trends is actually quite the classic! It’s the not-so-neutral neutral, kinda like the not-so-quiet quiet type. Yeah, that kind… These are statement pieces like your khaki trench that never ever goes out of style, for example this classic Burberry shell trench coat from Net-a-porter!
In other not-so-neutral neutrals, I also love this statement Akris suit from Bergdorf Goodman!
What are you favorite spring trends?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Feb 27, 2017 | Career
Viola Davis won Best Supporting Actress at the Oscars last night, and I’m still in my feelings. Watching this absolutely amazing woman, actress, mother, wife, human being walk up the stage in all her well-deserved glory to get her well-deserved Oscar had me tearing up. But it was her speech, one of her many striking, true-to-the-core, emotional speeches, that had me doing the ugly cry all over my late night dessert…
“You know, there’s one place where all the people with the greatest potential are gathered. And that’s the graveyard. People ask me all the time, what kind of stories do you want to tell, Viola? And I say, exhume those bodies, exhume those stories, the stories of the people who dreamed.”
As I listened to Viola (in my fertile imagination, Viola is my big sis, you may borrow her too), I heard the longing of my own heart. And that of so many others faced with the work of their lives, with dreams they may be weary of pursuing, with aspirations they may not think themselves worthy of…
I thought of those before us who also were faced with the work of their lives, with dreams and aspirations they may have ushered to the side for fear they wouldn’t be practical…Or just because life demanded a different, more grounded, less dreamy kind of living…Those whose talents, potential and spirit now lie in the graveyard, stuck somewhere in between the dash separating their birth dates from the day they died…
How many of us are also carrying within us those dreams, that potential, that extraordinary spirit, that can make an impact in the world? How many of us are burying those alive in stuffy cubicles, toxic work environments, and an all-around busy life that fails to provide us with the ultimate fulfillment and satisfaction we’re created to experience?
If you’re sitting in front of your computer today, feeling a gap where there should be a fill, sensing that there’s got to be MORE, then you may be concealing that potential, that spirit, that talent inside of you. Then you may be sacrificing fulfillment and satisfaction for the sake of normalcy and security…And yes, we all face different circumstances, have different obligations, and are not always at liberty to run free…Yet, if your life’s work, your life’s dreams, talent and potential, is unfinished, who may complete it?
After her historic win, in the midst of tears and intense emotion, Viola said: “I just wanted to be good at something!“
In her words, I heard once again the cry of so many women, so many sisters, working day in and day out, searching for the recognition they deserve. Don’t get me wrong, Viola certainly doesn’t need validation! Neither do we…Yet this precious sense that we’re doing work that is valued, that our contributions are cherished and recognized, has the power to fill us up and continually raise us to new heights. It’s the same value and recognition that so many women, so many sisters have been sorely missing in both their careers and lives. And that may very well be the reason why so many of us don’t dare to dream bigger, expect more and rise higher!
We all want to be good at something, and to be recognized for it! And sometimes, many times, it takes facing massive failure, taking gigantic risks, and switching courses to achieve it. But like Viola, being good, being great at something we love not only creates miracles, it sets the bar and opens the path wide for the rest of us…
Viola won, finally! The first Black woman to win an Emmy, an Oscar and a Tony, she won for women, for sisters, for minorities, for overcomers, for all those who wanted it big, and wanted it bad! But most importantly, she won for each and every one of us who may have, at some point or another, realized that there was MORE to their story, MORE to their circumstances, MORE to their surroundings! And instead of settling for normalcy, for tradition, for survival, decided to go out there and dream, thrive and succeed!
Without the Hattie McDaniels, the Halle Berrys, the Viola Davis’, and so many others, women like myself could not see ourselves winning on stage, in life and in our careers. Without those who dream, who dare, who persist, we couldn’t see ourselves clothed in the vision we have for our lives and communities!
So yes, Viola Davis won last night! And so did we…
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Feb 14, 2017 | Career
Ask me to list my favorite romantic movies of all times, and Love Jones is pretty sure to feature right next to the top. If you’ve seen the 1997 movie featuring my imaginary boyfriend Larenz Tate (he doesn’t know yet) and the ever-gorgeous and talented Nia Long as two artsy lovebirds on the rebound from Chicago, then you know all about getting the “love jones”, at least when it comes to your relationships…If you haven’t seen, Netflix people, Netflix…
via GIPHY
But how about getting the “love jones” in your career? You know, where you spend the majority of your time doing what you do? Remember when you started your first job, all fresh from college/school of hard-knocks/Mama’s basement, and you were all excited on Orientation Day? When you felt your first “love jones” for your career?
via GIPHY
According to a recent #LoveWhatYouDo survey by Adecco USA, 71% of women in the workforce love their jobs. And 29% of us don’t exactly got a love thang going on with work…Let’s admit it, there are times in your career when you’d rather skip dessert for a month than pull in to work. And other times when you’re ready to bring in homemade cookies to the team every other day…
Yet, if we’re going to spend most of our lives at work and fulfill our best potential, we deserve to love what we do. Besides, there’s something about having that “love jones” for your career that puts a pep in your step, a smile on your face, and some inspiration in your soul (in addition to seriously slowing the aging process)…
So for all you who may need to get that career love thang going, here are a few loving tips to fan those work flames all over again:
Keep It Fresh!
In relationships as in your career, boredom is a silent killer! Doing the same tasks over and over again can have you sink in a deep rut with no end. Instead, challenge yourself to keep it fresh! It could be as simple as learning something new every day, whether it’s meeting someone new, or researching new information, or even taking a course or reading a book.
You can also try switching things up a bit by collaborating with other teams, asking for a rotation, changing work locations every so often, or offering innovative solutions to old problems. As long as you make an effort to keep it fresh…
It’s About Relationships!
It’s one thing to keep your head down, getting your work done as effectively as possible. But it’s another to avoid or limit your interaction with other humans in the workplace, and may end up hurting your career and happiness altogether…
Strive to connect with others and develop healthy, collaborative relationships. This will not only make you more connected to the company as a whole, but will also immensely help out on those days you need a hand (or two) to help you out with your workload. Besides, what’s the point of coffee breaks without all the chatting (and gossip)…
Stand Empowered!
In relationships or at work, not feeling valued or important can negatively impact our love for what we do. If we don’t feel like we belong, or are not sure what role we play in the big picture, it can be easy to call it quits in search of more welcoming, meaningful professional pastures…
Instead, try and understand how you fit in, and how your particular responsibilities support the company’s wider objectives. If necessary, have a conversation with your manager or colleagues about it. You may very well get out of this with a pep in your step, and a better appreciation of how much what you do makes a difference…
Have a Life Outside of Work!
Work is important, but it’s certainly not everything. It can be tempting to focus so much on our careers that we forget that a large part of appreciating what we do, lies in appreciating what we do …outside of it. You know what they say, “absence makes the heart grow fonder”…Well, you ungluing yourself from your computer screen may just be what you need to rekindle that love thang with your career…
So enjoy your time away from the office, take a mental day every now and then, and stop checking your work email every other second like you ain’t got no social life…Call a girlfriend, order some Chinese food and watch a re-run of Love Jones, for love’s sake…
Ok, so now, got a love jones with your career going?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Feb 9, 2017 | Career
I have a confession: I sleep with my laptop…Right there, on my bedside, with the green light winking at me…I may even, sometimes, rest the palm of my hand on it to make sure it’s still right there in the wee hours of morning, when I jump out of bed to write…It’s not an obsession, it’s just a treacherous relationship, a “menage a trois” with two people and an inanimate object representing what some of us know all too well: the dilemma between what you love to do, who you love to love, and this knee-deep need to realize all of who you were created to be right in the middle…
It’s a dilemma that affects more women than we may think. You know, the ones who seem to have it all together, thrive on their Google calendars, cross off their to-do lists, and take their kids to piano (somewhat) on time. Those who silently wake up in the middle of the night to jot down blog post ideas, send a quickie email, or longingly hold on to their smartphones before reluctantly putting it down for the night. While many are still searching for what sets their souls on fire, these women have found IT. They’re also cheating on everyone else with IT…
So what do you do when you love what you do and you love who you have, and there aren’t enough hours in the day to satisfy both? When you may have to justify working so many hours at the expense of your couple? When some may call you selfish because you’re putting the passion stuff before the practical stuff…When you bargain with the dust in your house so you can have a few more hours to work on a project, rather than cleaning/doing laundry/cooking food? Is the verdict always guilty for women who cheat on their marriage with their work/passion/ambition?
Newsflash: we’re all cheating on our significant other (SO)/laundry/dust/elaborate meals with our work/passion/careers/interests. Because every time you’re scoring a slam dunk in your career or business, you’re also not there to catch every waking moment with your hubby and kids. And when you’re there snuggled under the covers with your family on Friday Family Movie Night, you’re not writing that epic novel, or closing that crazy awesome deal. As Shonda Rhimes says it so well:
So unless you can multiply your super-productive self or give up on sleep altogether, here are some ways to cheat well, at least when it comes to love and your career/work/passion:
Stop thinking you can do it all…at the same time!
If anyone tells me about work-life balance one mo’ again, I’m going to lose my fro’! You balance things when you can offset their value against each other. Except there will always be those moments in your life when it’s all about your family. And those moments when you’ll be intoxicated with work. And some moments when it seems you can handle both, until the scale starts tipping on one side or the other again…And it’s ok…
As long as you make peace with the fact that you can do it all, have it all, at different moments of your life, and that when you reach those mountains, you’ll enjoy the view instead of looking at what you’re missing out, you’ll be ok…Plus or minus some hazelnut chocolate..
Be there, just be there!
There’s a reason you can’t hug anyone and type a month-end report at the same time. Multi-tasking is a disease, and it will eat away at your edges. So when you’re out on a dinner date, be there, I mean, really be there! Shut off the phone, refrain from talking about work, and drink wine/eat dessert/enjoy the company!
That way when you’re back in a face-to-face with that beloved laptop of yours, you can give it your full, dedicated attention too…minus the wine and dessert…
Stop it with the guilt already.
Cut the crap guilt already! Being passionate about your work will not make you end up like the old cat lady (at least she had her cats). And you don’t have to choose between being a devoted partner and having a fulfilling career, either.
Guilt is like that piece of bread you can’t eat, yet doesn’t let you enjoy your vegetables (dipped in full-fat blue cheese dressing) either. Don’t do it! Just make sure to honor your relationship and your career when you’re there for either…It’s called clean conscience cheating!
Everyone else will be ok, really!
At the risk of bursting your bubble, both your career and partner will be ok if you don’t make it to Senior Partner, or make the perfect dinner for Valentine’s Day. There will be other Senior Partners, you will make it somewhere else, and no one will leave a disclosure on their will about the October month-end report not getting done. Besides, there are those places called restaurants opened on Valentine’s Day.
The only one you will be letting down is you, and that poor French coq-au-vin you’ll destroy…
Do what you want to do (sometimes)
I get it, we have to be practical. You must feed your kids and come home to your husband at least once a week. But in the midst of all the practical stuff to do, make some time to do what you want to do. If that’s working on that epic novel, then situate hubby down and give him (considerate) notice that you will be cheating on him with a fantastic story that may very well make you the next J. K. Rowling.
And if you must, draft that resignation letter to let your boss know you may be taking an indefinite amount of time off to cheat on your career with the love of your life somewhere between Paris and Morocco…
After all, it’s your life!
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
