by Solange Lopes | May 11, 2017 | Working Mom & Woman Tips
This post is part of a Working Mom series run by The Corporate Sister in honor of Mother’ Day.
Listen, if there ever were the equivalent of “Alcoholic Anonymous” for Chronically Late Working Moms, I’d be right there. On the front row, with that “guilty as charged” look all over my late face….Or I’d probably be running late to my “Chronically Late Anonymous” meeting too, trying to make up plausible excuses for being late to the late people meeting…All around too little too late…
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To be honest, motherhood didn’t really saddle me with my Chronically Late Syndrome. There was simply a transfer from horribly late teen, to seriously behind college student, to young women addicted to being late. And now, I was that mom who begged the school superintendent to spare her kids yet another late ticket because after all, the bell only rang 10 minutes ago…
As much as my case may warrant professional treatment, I’m far from being alone. Ask any working mom around if there’s one thing she’ll trade her favorite pair of heels, ice cream flavor and most flattering bra for, and you’ll most likely hear: Time! You know, that precious commodity that becomes even more precious than money or anti-aging cream after you give birth to one or a few little humans who seem to require all your extra time and energy.
I never thought I’d ever say I’d rather have extra time than my very own, very lavish personal shoe closet a la Carrie Bradshaw. But when you have to beg for a few minutes of silence as you focus on your bodily functions while sitting on the throne in the unwelcome company of little people asking for snacks, you know how crucial time is…
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After losing, wasting, and crying over spilled milk time over and over again (plus more than my share of missed doctors’ appointments, late fees and other time-related annoyances), I had to bow down to the gods of time management. After too many silently condemning looks from the kids’ teachers after we officially beat the lateness record for the entire grade, rushing out to the car without the car keys, and running so late I forgot about the buttons on my buttoned-down shirt, I decided it may be time for a change.
So for all my fellow Chronically Late Working Moms, or if you just want more time to hear your thoughts, here are some ways to actually create more time out of our busy schedules:
I know, this is a process, like getting over the fact we’ll never marry Denzel or have Gabrielle Union’s perfect skin! I was so conditioned to making to-do lists I started turning the kids into lists of deliverables with specific deadlines…There’s just something about laying down all these mini-goals and crossing them off the page with a loud sigh of victory and a delish chocolate reward…
But really, all these lists do is stress the heck out of us, taking us even further from Gabrielle Union’s perfect skin, so let’s ditch the to-do list! Besides, there’s always something to add to the list, which ends us never ending anyways.
That’s where the “Urgent/Not Urgent’ system comes in. Translation: if it’s not life-changing, life-altering, or doesn’t violate any law, it isn’t urgent and can wait.
Too simplistic! Maybe, but it at least allows you to sort in between what must be done now and what, like that pile of laundry from last Tuesday, can wait…
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Ever heard about the 80/20 rule? Aka the Pareto principle? This seemingly complex concept only states that 80% of our results come from 20% of our work. Just like 80% of the world’s wealth is distributed among 20% of the population…Now it’s just a matter of finding them and marrying them, but I digress…
So ask yourself this question: “ What’s the #1 thing you can do that will have the most impact?”
Ok, do that first.
Then what’s the #2 thing you can do with the most impact. Then do that next.
As a general rule, start with the toughest task. Some may argue that it’s pretty discouraging, but at the same time, it allows for more progress and peace of mind. How’s that for efficiency?
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Invest in rest and exercise
Ok, I have to admit, I’m the first one to which this rule applies. When it comes to rest and exercise, I’m a case study in need for improvement to happen.
But here’s the thing, the same way you invest your money in stocks, bonds or real estate, investing your money in actually taking care of that body and mind of yours can reap the best rewards over time. And no, I’m not talking about investing your haard-earned cash on the latest waterproof mascara and HD foundation at Sephora. Although, you know…
So I’m learning to actually set aside time for rest (think: go to bed early instead of watching the Real Housewives of Atlanta on repeat, so you can get up early), and exercise. The more you put in, the more you reap in terms of energy, clarity, and efficiency. Which also means the more you can do with your time…
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You’ve heard this before: “No is a complete sentence”. Some folks will never get it, but you actually don’t have to save the world, answer every phone call, and text everyone back. You can just say “No”, and save yourself some time to invest in YOU. Yup, just like that…
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So tell me, how will you be creating more time as a working mom?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Sep 5, 2016 | Career
It’s that time again on Sunday night, when you find yourself slouched up on the couch, scrolling through your Facebook feed and chomping on that last chocolate chip cookie. Sounds familiar? If it does, then you’re right there with about 65% of American workers who experience Sunday Night Blues every week.
Although you may be able to beat your most severe of Sunday Night Blues symptoms, wanting to eat your weight equivalent in cookies and indulge into yet another “Friends” marathon, that tightening in your chest may be more revealing than you think after all. It may be more than just wanting to live in your PJ’s forever more and instead a serious indication that it’s time for a move…A career move that is!
There’s nothing exciting about nearing a heart attack as you get ready to start the week, or hug your car door as you mentally motivate yourself not to drive back out of the parking lot. And when it starts happening more often than you crave coffee, you may want to take another look at what’s really happening in your career!
A career’s not supposed to be painfully endured with potential rewards of chocolate-covered madeleines and extra shoe-shopping trips. If you’re going to spend upwards of eight hours in a cubicle/office/mini “work kingdom”, you’ve gotta make it work! Which also means not just pocketing a paycheck at the end of the week, but also finding fulfillment, joy and an outlet to display your incredible talents and unique insight!
So if you’re thinking about upping your consumption caffeine to make it through the day, or treating yourself to yet one more Pinkberry escapade to drown your work sorrows into strawberry frozen yogurt, look for these four tell-tale signs that it’s time to make a career move:
Your Motivation Is As Low As Your Candy Supply
If you’ve been getting to work later and later, while being in no rush to complete any task, your motivation may be hitting an all-times low. And it’s not just because the kids are going back to school, or your overbearing in-laws are in town. You’re just constantly waking up with zero energy, and you’ve given up on coming up with any new ideas to improve your job. The occasional surge of energy you may muster goes straight to filling out your PTO (Paid Time Off) sheet.
Focusing Has Become Mission Impossible
Have you been complaining about how the clock seems to take a break when you’re at work? If you’re constantly checking the time, and praying for 5pm to come faster, you’re probably no longer stimulated at work. Whether it’s because your tasks have become repetitive and predictable, or because your manager isn’t challenging you enough, you’re just not able to focus and produce high-quality work.
You Suffer From Severe Career Envy
Are you feeling the green-eyed monster pinch every time a friend or colleague gets a promotion, or gets offered a new opportunity? Are you envious of the great careers you see in the media, or even just around you? It may be time to ask yourself why. It may just be that you’re more than ready for a career upgrade yourself. When you’re doing work that satisfies and fulfills you, you have more confidence to celebrate others. If competition and jealousy start overtaking your professional and personal life though, you may need a change.
You’re Just Not Yourself Anymore
If you haven’t been feeling yourself lately, it may have something to do with your career. Are you exhausted at the end of the day? Are you more irritable and snapping at everyone? Are you not excited to share details about your day? If you can’t seem to see the positive side of your career and life, and are instead complaining about management all the time, you may need a serious career move.
If you’re feeling any of these symptoms, it may be time to stop and smell the flowers memo! Don’t let yourself slide down this dangerous path, only to wake up ten or fifteen years later at the same job with the same constant “career blues”.
PS: Want to read more about making a career move and recharging your career? Join our “Recharge Your Career” challenge this month!
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jul 27, 2016 | Career
The middle of the year is always a good time to re-evaluate where you stand career-wise. Although it happens in the midst of summer activities, vacation time, and general work slump, when you’d rather be laying on the beach sipping on that margarita, it’s also a good point to stop and re-consider where you are career-wise.
From my own experience, as well as from speaking with fellow corporate sisters (and brothers), there are a lot of questions we can ask ourselves when getting to that mid-point, and starting the second half of the year. There may also be many changes, both in our personal and professional environments, that prompt us to re-consider the goals we set at the onset of the year. And all of this can be quite the complex process…
Yet, despite how busy the summer can get, and how demanding it can be for us to actually sit down and get into the mid-year review process frame of mind, it may be more rewarding than we think in the end.
While I can certainly go on and on about what to check for and think about as you embark on the second half of the year, I’ve tried for my own sake (and sanity) to boil down the process to three basic questions:
Am I On Track?
This is question numero uno to ask yourself at mid-year review time. Where do you stand as related to the goals you had at the beginning of the year? Have you shown improvement, or are you still struggling in some areas?
This question may be a challenging one to face. After all, things happen, plans get changed, and life gets in the mix. After, there’s only so much you can do in about 6 months. Yet, it’s important to stop, take a breather, and assess where you are in your career before getting back up and running again…
If I’m Not On Track, What Do I Need to Stay on Track?
Whether you want it or not, there are areas in your career where you may not be on track. Or areas where you may be doing ok, but you’re suspecting you may not be able to keep up for long. In this case, rather than blaming yourself for what you didn’t get to do, why not proactively ask yourself what you need to do to make it better?
I used to get down on myself at mid-year review time for not being able to reach this or that milestone. In turn, my attitude would affect the rest of my year, and hinder the performance I could have had for the next six months. Don’t make this mistake! Your mid-year career assessment is a tool to finish the year successfully, so use it to your advantage!
Do you need more support to stay or get back on track? Do you need more time? Or do you need to re-allocate some resources to allow you to reach your objectives? Take an honest assessment of where you stand, and what you really require to move ahead.
You may find that you must re-adjust your strategy, change your thinking, or correct some past mistakes. Yet all in all, assessing what you (and others) need to do to allow you to cross that finish line at year-end is a priority.
Do your goals need some adjusting?
Do you need to adjust some of your goals? Or do you feel comfortable with your current progress? Do you need to aim higher, or dial down your ambitions a bit? Is your goal even still relevant?
Your department, or even company at large, may have shifted strategies in the course of the year. For you, this may mean that the goals you started out with need to be re-evaluated along the way. Or it could be that a new opportunity presents itself, and you may have to re-align your goals not to let it pass you by. Remember to be flexible when necessary!
How do you assess your progress at mid-year?
To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | Jun 23, 2016 | Career
For the longest time, I dreaded networking like I’d dread a root canal procedure at the dentist. Everything about it, from entering a room filled with strangers to introducing myself without stepping all over my words, would make me want to run back under my covers with a solid pint of sea salt caramel ice cream. And I know I’m not alone….
For many professional women, networking is not exactly at the top of their favorite corporate sports.
When it comes to the benefits of networking, our male colleagues tend to get the upper hand. Not to mention the fact that with all our other obligations at home and in life in general, hanging out at the bar after-hours isn’t always an option. Neither is swinging a golf set in the middle of the afternoon…And it certainly doesn’t help that the most common places and ways to network have been predominantly set by men. And this may very well be the reason why networking still fails women in general…
I remember talking to female colleagues at work, as we’d pretty much all complain about having to go to some networking event or another. For many of us young moms, that’d also mean having to delegate POD (Parent-On-Duty) responsibilities for the evening, including pick-up, bath time, and dinner…Or miss the kids’ bedtime…So we’d devise more or less smart strategies to try and get out of the event as early as we could, to reduce the impact at home. As a result, more often than not, we wouldn’t enjoy the event and would end up stuck in a corner with familiar faces, instead of mingling, having fun, and making valuable career connections.
Hindsight 20/20, while it may not have been the most career-forward approach at the time, it was, and still is, a reality many women at work are confronted with. In a modern world where women are representing an increasingly larger share of the corporate world, a skill as invaluable as networking is still based on traditional (and somewhat sexist) patterns set by men decades ago. Networking, especially at the executive level, is still largely done after-hours, in what appears to be exclusive circles reserved to a lucky few.
Yet, even as women are rising in the corporate world, the reality still is that we still carry a significant part of the responsibilities on the home front. Additionally, considering that we’ve been kept out for the longest time of some of the most exclusive networking groups aka the proverbial “boys’ clubs”, we’ve also been indirectly conditioned to perceive networking as outside of our gender, so to speak. Doesn’t then the very concept need to be re-invented and re-adapted to a more fitting reality for both men and women at work?
Through my own experience and by watching the evolution of networking in mine and others’ careers, especially women’s, it seems it’s been about time for professional women to re-invent the concept of networking (and why we may need to do less and network more):
NETWORKING IS NOT AN EXCLUSIVE PRIVILEGE RESERVED TO A FEW
It starts with making networking more accessible to everyone, and especially to professional women, regardless of grade or title. The only way to get better at any skill is to practice it, and networking is no exception. However, many networking events are reserved for higher-level employees, or accessible only through dues and payments, which serves greatly to discourage many women from joining. As a result, some of the valuable resources shared during these events, as well as the instrumental connections made, are not accessed by most.
What if companies could invest in setting up both formal and informal networking opportunities for their employees on a more or less regular basis? Or if some exclusive networking associations would make their membership fees more affordable, and open their doors to more professional women?
Providing incentives for professional women to view networking as an essential skill they have access to develop would change the face of both companies and women’s careers.
NETWORKING SHOULD BE PERVASIVE TO ALL ASPECTS OF OUR CAREERS; IF YOU’RE WORKING, YOU’RE NETWORKING!
Not being able to make it to the bar after-hours, or to the golf club, should not preclude anyone, especially professional women, from accessing great professional networks. Unfortunately, it’s too often the case. Somehow, we’re conditioned to believe and act as if effective networking is dependent upon a specific place and time.
Instead, it should be based on the simple principle that “if you’re working, you’re networking.” Any work interaction, whether at meetings, informal gatherings, or even the trivial exchange of emails, is an opportunity to network. It’s a chance to come into contact with other professionals, exchange resources, and keep in touch, aka “networking”.
Considering women tend to be more collaborative in their work approach, incorporating this principle would benefit us greatly! What if more women understood this simple principle, and leveraged their daily interactions to build their own network regularly? And what if companies stressed more the importance of regularly networking as a part of our careers, instead of reserving it for the company summer or holiday party?
WOMEN’S GROUPS ARE THE FIRST STEP TO GETTING MORE WOMEN TO MORE ACTIVELY NETWORK
I’ve had the opportunity to be involved in exceptional women’s groups, like Ellevate Network for instance. Through m y experiences networking with women, I’ve noticed how much more comfortable we can be interacting with other professional women. Sharing our common experiences, struggles and victories, makes it easier to relate to each other and be inspired to progress and create change.
Women’s networking groups like these can be a crucial first step for many women into the world of professional networking. So many women who may be intimidated to attend certain professional events, may be more drawn towards these. In turn, they may develop their networking skills, and be inspired by other women creating change in their own professional spheres.
Which in turn creates a snowballing effect as it encourages more and more women to come forward, develop their skillset, and have the initiative to join, or even create, other networks. We all have to start somewhere, and starting in women’s networking groups or associations may just be the ticket for many of us…
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To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
by Solange Lopes | May 25, 2016 | Career
If you’re a “corporate entrepreneur”, you know how challenging it can be to build and run your business, while holding down the fort at your day job, in addition to dealing with the rest of Life. You know how limited your time is, and how much there is to do all around. And that cutting on your sleep isn’t going to help with your sanity or those pesky under-eye circles either…This is where apps comes into play…
When I started blogging while working full-time, I was frankly overwhelmed. As my caffeine consumption shot up, so did whatever sanity I had left at the time (in addition to there not being enough concealer in the whole wide world to fix that look of exhaustion). Something had to give…
If you can relate to late nights, early mornings, and constant bursts of caffeine, here are 10 apps that can help running your business while working full-time, keeping some of your sanity, and even finding time to shoe-shop online:
- Evernote: This is my “backup brain”, as I like to call it. You can literally store all kinds of information into Evernote, in the form of notes organized in notebooks with tags and references. This app helps you sync notes across your mobile and desktop platforms. Great app if you’re bombarded with information and want to keep all of it in one safe place!
- Fuze: Videoconference much? This app helps you host online meetings for all devices and operating systems. It’s free for up to 25 participants, and jumps to less than $15/month for up to 125 participants. There’s also a free 30-day trial period available.
- Pomodoro: This productivity app has changed my life! It incorporates the principles of the Comodoro technique, and helps you create tasks, set up breaks, and track your entire productivity throughout the day, week or month! Ah-mazing!
- Skype: Despite all the competition, Skype is still the Queen of videoconferencing. It lets you hold calls all over the world, share files and photos, as well as your computer screen, with groups of up to 25 people. The basic plan is also still free!
- Paypal: This app is really convenient to process payments from customers on the go. It lets you link your debit, credit and other bank accounts to your Paypal platform. Now, it also lets you use a tablet or other device, as well as Paypal’s card reader as a portable register (mostly as a way to compete with Square).
- Wave: Accounting and invoicing giving you headaches? This easy app helps you do it conveniently, and for free!
- Dropbox: No room to store and share files? Dropbox helps you do just that by storing your files on the cloud. Especially useful for telecommuters who need to access their files on the go, or share them in one central location. The basic plan is free, and there are trial periods available as well.
- Wunderlist: If you’re a fan of to-do lists and checking things off like myself, then Wanderlust is your go-to app. It’s an oldie but a goodie, that helps you check off the holiday vacation planning just as well as that big contract to draft!
- Facebook Messenger: A lot of business is being done on Facebook these days. This app lets you communicate with your Facebook contacts without having to be on the social media network (read: no excess browsing). Talk about effective and time-saving!
- Mail chimp: If you’re looking to use email marketing in your business (and you should), this app helps you create easy newsletters, manage your mailing lists and track your subscribers. You can use this information to learn more about your customer base, and market to them more effectively!
What tools do you use to run your business while working full-time?
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To your success,
The Corporate Sister.
