Photo credit: www.insidewomanmag.com

Today’s post is a contribution from our dear guest contributor Stephanie Samuel. In this piece, Stephanie is providing us with some sisterly tips to negotiate the raise you deserve…Go ‘head Stephanie :)

When was the last time you sat down and talked to a girlfriend about how much you make? Scary as it sounds, trading experiences with a bosom buddy may give you the boost you need to meet with your employer and ask for a fair wage.

If you’re like me, you are probably too embarrassed to admit you are not receiving the salary you should be making. But if you put yourself out on a limb, you might discover some things:

First, you’re not alone.

A Spring 2015 report from the American Association of University Women(AAUW) reveals women in every state and occupation have experienced the gender pay gap – even in female-dominated fields such as education.

The gender pay gap is even worse among minority women. Hispanic female workers’ salaries show the largest gap according to this AAUW’s report. They tend to receive 54 percent of what their white male counterparts earn!

Secondly, you will also get to learn there are women around you who are beefing up their negotiation skills and getting what they deserve!

They’re not the Sheryl Sandbergs or Patricia Arquettes of this world though; they are friends, pew mates and sorority sisters – every day women who, like you, are working to climb the professional ladder and provide for their families.

Nearly a year ago, I gathered up all my courage and told my friend Dana I wanted to ask my boss for a raise, but was unsure of myself. Truth is, the resulting conversation helped me feel so much more empowered and less alone.

Dana, an office manager and administrative assistant to the CEO of her company, mentioned she had recently gone through the same thing and gotten through with the help of a male colleague and the book Knowing Your Value by Morning Joe’s Mika Brzezinski. This experience, she shared with me, taught her a lot of about negotiating before and after landing a job.

I’ll revisit our conversation for you, The Corporate Sister’s readers. It went a little bit like this:

Dana: This past Christmas, as I was sifting through some materials that came across my desk, I realized the company was giving out a Christmas bonus. If you were part of management, you got a different percentage than if you were non-management. When the bonuses came out, I realized I got the percentage allocated to non-management employees, yet I am a manager! 

I called Human Resources to ask if I should I have gotten a different bonus, and was told, well no because [although] “your job title technically qualifies you for the management bonus, not every one who has “manager” in their title gets it”. Huh? Well I kind of thought it was unfair because I looked at the people who did get it and realized my job was just as challenging. I knew right away I had to have a conversation with my boss, since I had already spoken to Human Resources and he was the only one who could overrule them. 

It took me a long two weeks to finally send an email over the weekend. I wrote to him that this was a touchy and difficult subject to talk about– I was careful to start with that — yet I was not sure I understood (or agreed with) why I wasn’t included in the management bonus. As a result, within the hour literally, I did end up getting my management bonus!

My manager immediately sent an email to Human Resources – this is was on a Saturday afternoon— and responded to me saying they would contact me on Monday; in case they didn’t, I was to let him know immediately. 

Me: It sounds exactly like what happened with Morning Joe’s Mika [Brzezinski] and her co-host Joe [Scarborough]: when Joe found out she wasn’t making as much as he was, he really fought for her and was like no, you’re getting this!

Dana: Yep, he really did! Yet even in my email where I started with “OK this is a touchy subject.”, I was almost apologizing as I was writing it for having to ask for what I deserved!

Me: Were you friends with your manager at that point?

Dana: Yes, I was also friends with the Human Resources Director at that point too … Of course, my boss, who was the CEO, outranked Human Resources… I have a close relationship with him because we work together day by day, and was also close to the head of HR due to the nature of our work.  Yet I found it easier to address the Director of HR because she was a woman. 

I found I was picking and choosing my words with my own boss, and ended up waiting two weeks for something he actually thought should have been done earlier. And had I never asked the question, I wouldn’t have gotten the compensation I deserved! 

Me: What was holding you back from asking for the raise?

Dana: I didn’t want to come across as too greedy. That was one of the things I remember thinking to myself. I remember even assessing whether I even needed the money, which was totally irrelevant. It was [about] the salary that went with the job, and I was doing the job that warranted that salary. 

Me: That thought you had, do I really need the money, do you think male co-workers would have that same thought process?

Dana: No. I feel they would ask for what they feel  they deserve. I’ll never forget when my boss, the CEO, came on board and how firmly he negotiated his salary coming in the door. I remember him going back and forth with HR. I even remember noting to him how much vacation time he got, and him proudly acknowledging it was a result of his tough negotiations. 

My friend Dana was right. As you look for the job and compensation we deserve as women and employees in general, let’s keep in mind research and documentation are an important part of asking for a raise. And the confidence to do so is crucial…

The AAUW recommends women start by establishing a target income based on research on the position, the job sector in which they’re employed, as well as the marketplace. It also states women should also be able to articulate how they contribute to the company’s mission and why they are valuable assets on the job.

And while you’re at it,  my best advice would be to start practicing with a friend to grow your own confidence…

 Stephanie Samuel is a reporter with over nine years of experience. She has written for various publications including the AFRO-American, the Prince George’s Sentinel, and The Christian Post. You can follow her on Twitter @stephlivinlive