How many times have you switched from one task to the other, anxiously trying to get through your long to-do list as fast as you could? Or absent-mindedly listened to the kids, while furiously answering emails? Or almost dropped the phone in the dinner pot while talking your boss through a last-minute work snafu after-hours? I bet more than once…As working women and working moms spread thin between all our obligations and commitments, it may seem that we work all the time. We work at work, and then we work some more at home, most often switching back and forth between the two in an attempt to be more productive.
This is exactly the conversation I was having with my girlfriend the other day, as we both were complaining on our way to work about how much we had to do, all the time. There never seemed to be an end to what had to be done, accomplished, or finished.
According to this Michigan state study, women tend to multi-task 10 hours more than men do. Yet, abundant research shows that multi-tasking does not improve performance at all. It actually makes us more prone to making mistakes and being less efficient and effective. As a matter of fact, going from task to task not only makes us less productive, but it also hurts our creativity and memory. It’s also detrimental to our well-being in general, as we may tend to feel more overwhelmed and anxious.
As an ambitious overachiever with more ambition than actual stamina, I, like so many other working moms, was tired of burning the candle at both ends. After reading umpteen books about organization and productivity to no avail, squishing my to-do list every which way, and complaining to whoever was available to listen, I decided to give the whole “mindfulness” concept out. Being mindful is basically being more focused in the moment, which I could certainly use in the midst of the confusion around me. Thankfully, it’s a skill that can be learned and acquired over time through the practice of meditation for instance.
For me, it began with committing to a regular meditation practice. The simple act of focusing my attention on my breathing helped me increase my attention skills. Which in turn helped me focus more, so I could actually accomplish more in less time. The most challenging part was to consciously limit my multi-tasking tendencies. While I haven’t succeeded just yet at completely eliminating multi-tasking from my life and work just yet, I’m getting closer each day.
Here are a few of the ways mindfulness has changed my life and work as a working woman and mom, and can change yours too:
- Being more present
“Mommy, are you here?”
When my son asked me this question on a day we were stuck at home due to a snow storm, as I was trying to fit in some work and brownie baking all at once, I had to stop for a minute. He was right. I wasn’t being present. I was trying to do too many things at once, botching both in the process, and getting more frustrated by the second. Now I try and ask myself as much as possible: “Am I here or am I trying to be in more than one place at once?”
While I apply this mostly at home, it has made a significant difference in my work as well, by refraining from multi-tasking. Instead, I choose to focus on one single task at a time, even if it may seem that it takes longer. The result? Better outcomes overall, less mistakes, and most importantly, more peace.
- Practicing gratitude
We live in a culture that tends to value commiserating and complaining. After all, misery loves company, right? Wrong. A while ago, I saw some positivity campaign on social media advocating a 30-day no-complaining challenge, which I tried for the sake of it. Shall I mention that I barely made it through the first hour? I started realizing how much I had gotten used to not being grateful for everything I had.
The more I read about practicing gratitude and tried it myself, the more I could feel the benefits. Writing 5 or 10 things I ‘m grateful for makes a major difference in my day. Although my circumstances didn’t change much, neither did traffic or the state of humanity, it just felt better to be more appreciative. The better it felt, the better life and work felt. Interestingly enough, the better the results I got as well…
- Focus on feeling good
This may sound counter-intuitive (at least it did to me in the beginning), but I believe it to be the key to success, whatever your definition of success may be. There’s power in positive energy and thoughts, and that’s exactly what feeling good is. The more I put myself in situations where I felt good instead of miserable, the more my thoughts would positively change. As a result, the more positive the results too…
Conversely, when not feeling well or dealing with challenging circumstances, going for a quick sweat session or run, putting on a funny movie, laughing with a friend, would change the trajectory of my day. Hence, the importance of doing what we love and surrounding ourselves with people who bring out the best in us.
Has mindfulness changed your life and work?
The Corporate Sis.
