Your kids are ruining your career – onemagusa.com

I am a mom of two, and for the longest time, I heard the same old proverbial warnings: “Make sure you finish school before having kids”, or “You know once you have kids, it’s over!”. Or even better, “Work hard before kids because afterwards it’s all downhill from there!”. Basically, before I even conceived the very idea of conceiving a child, the message was clear: “Kids will ruin your career, and oh, maybe even your entire life.”

I was reading this article from Politico yesterday, in which Ruth Porat, CFO at prestigious Morgan Stanley and also dubbed as “the most powerful woman on Wall Street”, was featured. When you hear of women like Ruth Porat, you don’t exactly picture the traditional mommy thing. No pun intended here. I am not a traditional mommy, and frankly never aspired to be. Yet what struck me (and even made me go awww) as I read the article is that Ms. Porat keeps a note from her kids on her desk telling her how proud they are of her and the work she does. I know, awww!!! Clearly, her kids did not ruin her career…

Yet so many of us women at work seem to think that we have to choose between a great family and a great career. It’s not even like we could strike in the middle, and have an average family and an unbelievable career. Or an average career and a great family life. It’s an all-or-nothing game, hence the disheartening number of women in high management positions, and the sprint-race speed at which women exit corporate ranks to stay home as they start having kids. Again, makes it really look like as much as we love them, kids really ruin your career.

So how come the Ruth Porat of this world could achieve the supernatural feat of having kids AND kicking a… in the career department? Luck, favor, spiritual incantations? In her interview with Politico, Ms. Porat seems to think a healthy mix of career and family is the answer, rather than delaying one in favor of the other.

I would add that reminding yourself as you tuck the kids in bed tonight, that as mighty as they may seem, they can’t possibly ruin your career (or the one you think you had, deep inside that career-oriented head of yours). Actually, they may just be the the best people you’ll ever have to negotiate basic cleanliness contracts with…

Just sayin’….

The Corporate Sis.