Working mothers are hitting a wall during and as we slowly emerge from this pandemic. Millions among them are exiting the doors of their hard-earned careers for lack of adequate childcare and support. Many more are silently caving under the pressure of wearing too many hats while still having to uphold the very fabric of our families and societal structures. In the midst of all this pressure, the very concept of mothering has been made incredibly more complex than ever, what with the forced necessity to homeschool children while in quarantine, the instability of schools, educational institutions and governments, and the ever-looming threat of economic precariousness, political volatility, and health scares…
The beautiful gift that is mothering has become fraught with uncertainty, pressures and distractions of all kinds, from social media debates on the validity of vaccines to the need to do it all for our children, families and careers without ever skipping a beat…The result? Working mothers are exhausted. Not from the exhaustion that requires a day (or a month) off, or a nice vacation in a far-away tropical location with exotic beaches and strong cocktails…Rather, working moms are in dire need of a simplified, more balanced, less mentally, physically and emotionally tyrannical idea of what parenting ought to be in the 21st century…An idea that demands re-imagining the concept of motherhood down to its essential basics, rather than up to unattainable ideals of performance.
How do we re-imagine, then, a simpler idea of working motherhood than the one we’ve been grappling with for the past 18 months, and frankly, for years before that?
The first step here is admitting to ourselves that we’ve pushed ourselves, often through no or little fault of our own, way past the brink of over-exhaustion. In sometimes desperate attempts to prove we can have it all, so many of us have, consciously or not, subscribed to an elusive idea of performative motherhood anchored in perfectionism, guilt and laced with heavy hints of imposter syndrome.
The second step is to realize at the end of the day that although we can have it all, we can’t have it all at the same time…That everything is a trade-off… That some seasons might have us trade our purpose and fulfillment for our families, while others may have us stepping on the gas of our calling as our little ones learn to fly off the nest on their own…That all in all, even as we may count some as losses and others as gains, nothing is wasted in the building of the unique mothers birthed and grown out of our unique experiences and callings…
Last but not least, simplifying the idea of modern motherhood requires us to make peace with and embrace the uncertainty and change that are not only at the core of motherhood, but has also been our reality for the past 18 months. Understanding that change is the only constant, especially as working moms navigating a precarious global health crisis, not only helps us keep our sanity; but also helps us model a nimbler, more flexible and adaptable way of working and living.
Are you re-inventing a simplified approach to work and life?
The Corporate Sister
