Photo credit: dailyworth.com

It is said your home and family are the foundation for success. It’s at home growing up that we’re supposed to learn what it means to cooperate, collaborate, and support each other. It’s also at home that we pass along work ethic to our children. Yet it’s also within our families, both close and extended, that we get way too closely acquainted with feelings like self-doubt, jealousy and resentment, especially around successful careers.

In minority communities such as the Latino community for instance, where the college completion rate remains low despite increasing enrollment, career success is unfortunately far and few in between. The recent governmental initiatives to increase college opportunity for  low-income and minority students hope to address the educational and career success gap for minority students, yet there are still too few of us making it past entry-level careers. And for those of us who do, or at least are striving to do so, we may have to deal with yet another obstacle in our way, family resentment.

As the first to graduate from college in her family, Maria felt the pride of accomplishment and success. Yet she is also constantly reminded of the price her parents had to pay for her success, from leaving their native Mexico to taking menial jobs to survive…and how her family expects payback, and may even resent her for what she’s accomplished. Tia is rising in the corporate ranks, and making a name for herself in her field of Electrical Engineering. Yet, every time she goes home, she feels she has to justify her achievements to her less fortunate family members…in addition to financially supporting them.

Remember the family drama in BET’s Mary Jane? Not only is Mary Jane Paul, a successful TV reporter, out of love, but also out of family support as she struggles to care for a needy family? What about one of my favorites, Soul Food, in which corporate mogul Teri resents being the family’s ATM? While a frequent reality in minority communities due in part to socio-economic reasons, family resentment towards career success is widespread across all communities.

Truth is, career success does bring about resentment and jealousy, even and especially in closer circles such as family. For many, it’s a painful reminder of lost opportunities, deferred dreams and even personal failures. And it unfortunately creates the lack of generational support and supportive network, which in turn breeds declining performance and a general professional apathy.

Recognizing family resentment and even opposition to one’s career is one of the first steps to addressing the problem. Acknowledge the harsh truth of the situation, so as not to allow it to prevent you from moving forward.

Have you experienced resentment from your family towards your career’s success? How did you react? Any advice?

The Corporate Sis.