Let it the be the Weekend is our weekly news roundup, where we share fun, exciting and breaking news for working women and moms…
This week hit us hard as the world is grieving the loss of Chadwick Boseman, our beloved Wakanda Forever King T’Challa;
In historical news this week, Fabiana Pierre-Louis has become New Jersey Supreme Court’s first Black woman justice;
Black Enterprise writes about Jessica Krug, an Afro-Latina activist who recently revealed she’s a White Jewish woman, and we’re scratching our heads over here;
Business Insider lists 11 top online college degrees where graduates can earn more than $90,000;
Working Mother reveals 84% of employees’ mental health is suffering from working from home;
Recruiting Blogs shares tips to stay productive while working from home;
Entrepreneur tips you off on 10 side hustle skills you can acquire this Labor Day weekend;
Time to vote! Refinery 29 encourages Latina voters with the news of Eva Longoria and America Ferreira launching “She Se Puede”;
Motherly offers 10 tips from a teacher to make distance learning work;
Moved recently or planning to move? The Corporate Sister presents the 10 commandments of moving with kids.
Moving is a process. Moving with kids is…a very complicated process, which I had the opportunity to learn the hard way recently after 14 years in our beloved first home. Little did I anticipate the amount of work, frustration, and sheer exhaustion that comes with hauling over a decade of belongings, memories, and people (little and big) from one location to the next, while still “wifing”, mothering and working, not to mention looking somewhat human in the middle of a pandemic, in the process.
I remember moving as a child, and it seeming like the most exciting adventure, albeit my mother screaming in the background for us to get it together. Fast-forward a few decades, a couple of kids and one husband later, the sense of adventure was still there. Except this time, it was a different kind of adventure. The kind that makes you want to pull your hair out, pour yourself a glass of rose before lunch, as you still manage to wonder at the grace of God allowing you to stand on two feet and move forward…It’s also the kind that teaches you so much more than any HGTV home renovation show ever could, from how not to pack fragile glasses to how to keep your cool when you can’t find anyone’s underwear for days…
If you’ve gone through a move or two as a working mom without losing your sanity, first of all, you’re my kind of woman and I salute you. If you have, you’re also my kind of woman and I’m right there with you. In any case, I’m thankful, and you may be too, for the lessons learned in the process, some of which I have gathered below as my 10 Commandments of Moving as a Working Mom:
Thou Shalt Pack Well!
You don’t know the importance of proper packing until you tearfully unpack a box full of broken glassware, and there’s no one else to blame but yourself. As a repeat offender guilty of poor packing, I have changed my ways this time around, and have invested instead in Uhaul moving kits complete with boxes, tape and bubble wrap, plus the labeling markers to boot.
The upside to this is you can make the whole packing experience a fun process for the kids too. They will love to put boxes together, organize their own things and learn in the process too…
Thou Shalt Find the Right Moving Transportation
Here’s the thing with accumulating stuff for over a decade. Other than going through it all and packing it, you’ve got to physically move it from one location to the next. In the middle of a pandemic and with social distancing in effect, this was a real challenge! This is where booking the appropriate moving trucks through companies such as Uhaul or Zipcar comes in handy, reducing the number of trips you have to make and condensing the entire process.
This also helps to keep family life organized, as you can free up the use of your own car for work and family needs, and still be available for the kids’ activities.
Thou Shalt Get Help!
Moving is hard, and moving in the middle of a pandemic is extra hard. Hence the need for extra helping hands, which you can get from companies such as TaskRabbit, where you can get help with moving by vetted individuals right in your area.
As a working mom and a working parent in general, this is so important as time is such a precious commodity.
Thou Shalt Plan Ahead
If you can, allow yourself a week, or at least a couple of days between closing and moving in, especially if you’re both selling and buying at the same time. This will give you time to schedule any work that needs to get done before your kids start baptizing the new walls or experimenting with hammers and other construction tools.
In addition, don’t forget to plan ahead for mail transfer services, as well as to change your utility and phone services. Trust me, there is nothing like spending hours on the phone with your utility company as the kids are complaining non-stop about the lack of wifi in the house…
Thou Shalt Get Connected!
Just because you’re moving doesn’t mean life has to stop, which means work, emails, and kids’ cartoons still go on. Which also means you need to get connected at your new place, especially if you’re in the middle of a pandemic with nowhere else to go, and you’re also working from home…
This is where companies such as Verizon or AT&T for instance, can help in establishing your new or continuing connection, before your boss realizes you’ve missed about 100 emails and your kids go on a strike because they now have to use their imagination…
Thou Shalt Get organized
Organization, organization, organization! This seems to be the keyword when moving, especially when you cannot locate your toothbrush for a couple of days or have to hunt around for soap. It happens…
Instead of struggling to fit all the kids’ socks into one corner of a drawer, consider investing in organization essentials, such as shelving tools, closet accessories, and decorative storage from places such as The Container Store for example.
Thou Shalt Abort the Diet
The first few days after moving are hard enough without having to watch your waistline. Those are official non-diet days, during which services like GrubHub and HelloFresh delivering food or ingredients to your door are more than welcome. Besides, the kids will thank you for the occasional Chick-Fil-A dinner delivery and being able to still have Taco Tuesday in the middle of unpacking boxes…
If you really insist on whipping out your grandmother’s favorite rice and beans recipe, then you can always order groceries through Amazon Prime for Whole Foods or Peapod for instance.
Thou Shalt Consider DIY
A new home also comes with new…projects. Whether they are small or big, these may require you to do some level of DIY work. We’ve recently spent more time than I would normally care for at the likes of Home Depot and Bed Bath & Beyond . I’m actually growing to enjoy home décor and renovations quite a bit, and my new favorite place to hang out is Hobby Lobby. For larger construction projects, my brother-in-law put me on to Build.com, which I cannot recommend enough.
If like myself you’re not anticipating much DIY work, think again, there’s always something to adjust, fix, or put to your own taste when you change homes. This is also a great opportunity to involve the little ones, and make them feel part of the process as they’re getting accustomed to their new space…
Thou Shalt Furniture Shop On a Budget
For those of you upsizing, you may need to shop for new furniture, which also means additional expenses on top of all the other expenditures you’ve already faced. However, I’m finding that there are ways to shop for quality furniture on a budget. Some of my favorite places to do so include Ashley Home Furniture and Raymour & Flanigan for example.
If you’re working from home, you can get affordable, quality office furniture at places such as OfficeFurniture.com.
Thou Shalt take a break!
Lat but not least, taking a break from the whole ordeal of moving, especially as a working mom, is absolutely crucial. This moving thing is not a matter of a few days, weeks or months. It’s a marathon that may take longer than expected, especially when tackling DIY home improvement projects or re-decorating a larger space.
Take breaks whenever you can, and build in a self-care routine as part of your everyday schedule so you don’t burn the candle on both ends. Order yourself some spa and skincare goodies from Sephora, Ulta, or Birchbox. Or chill out with a movie on Hulu or Netflix.
Yes, moving is a process, especially as a working mom. Yet, with a bit of advance preparation and your own take on my 10 commandments of moving as working moms, we can all do it…without too much of our sanity left behind.
What are your best tips to move efficiently as a working mom?
PS: Please note this post includes some affiliate links, which means that if you purchase products or services through some of these links, I may get an affiliate commission. Please note I only recommend the products and services I believe in and hope will server you well.
It’s back-to-school time and it certainly is looking much different than any other back-to-school times we’ve experienced so far. We’re in the middle of a pandemic as a potentially life-changing election is looming near, and none of us has any idea what tomorrow will look like. As parents, and especially as working moms, this is not back-to-school as usual, it’s back-to-school as our tired minds and hearts can muster it. And frankly, at this point, we’ve been stretched so far beyond what we can take that we’re not sure how much more we can take…
As we plan for sanitized back-to-school lunches and super-hero-themed masks (or not), along with preparing for the threat of Zoom fatigue in our kids’ eyes, it’s hard not to feel the tight grip of parental anxiety and stress. As a matter of fact, it’s hard to get rid of it most of the time, as we admonish our little ones to wash their hands 100 times a day, and take the limits of safety and cleanliness as far as we can.
However, dealing with this anxiety is neither healthy nor sustainable for ourselves, our families and anyone who comes in contact with us. While we may have to learn to live with it, here are a few tips to alleviate it as we navigate through this back-to-school season like no other:
Obtain as much accurate information as possible
While none of us can predict tomorrow, getting as much accurate information from the right people as possible helps. This means getting better acquainted with official information from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), from your own state, city and town, as well as from your school department and particular school as well.
While there is a lot of misinformation on COVID-19, there are also reliable sources of information, especially those directly affecting our families and children that should be consulted periodically.
Don’t forget to take the kids’ perspective into account
It’s no wonder that this pandemic and current crisis has stressed and stretched working parents to the limit. Yet, it has also affected our children’s mental health and well-being, as they have seen their familiar freedom, habits and ability to socialize taken away from one day to the other.
This back-to-school season is not just different, but is also bound to be traumatic for many, if not most of us. This is where care comes into play. Not just self-care, but also family care for the entire family unit. This may take the form of regular family conversations, or some time away from each other, or maybe some therapy.
Setting up a family care program that encompasses everyone in the family may also help bring unspoken issues to the forefront, and help the entire family overcome this back-to-school season together.
How are you coping with this back-to-school season?
Dear Working Mom is our weekly love letter to working moms everywhere, where we talk about motherhood, life, work and everything in between…
Dear Working Mom,
First off, let me start by saying: We see you! We hear you! It’s been said over and over again that this pandemic has been particularly taxing for working moms. While for most of us, working from home during this pandemic is a saving grace, for many of us deprived of childcare, school and the help of our villages, it has been unbelievably hard. For those of us deemed essential workers, it’s been a matter of teetering at the edge of life and death on a daily basis. For all of us, it’s been one of the most, if not the most, challenging journeys of our lives. Hardest of all, has been the guilt we already feel continuously as working mothers, which only got amplified with the anxiety, stress and constant multi-tasking that became our new normal.
It’s the same guilt we, as working moms have been living with for decades, as the choice between work and family keeps being imposed to us by society and norms that still oppose gender equity. It’s the same guilt we feel when we seem to have it all, but constantly have to give one thing in exchange of satisfying another…A guilt that any crisis, especially one like the current pandemic, only serves to exacerbate in the worst way, as we painfully switch between professional focus and caregiver’s attentiveness to fulfill all our roles.
Yet, we’re doing the best we can. As a matter of fact, we’re doing more than the best we can. We’re going above and beyond, at the risk of our sanity, equilibrium and even health. We’re even quitting our jobs out of necessity, and yes, out of guilt…Yet, it’s time to break up with this destructive guilt we’ve been conditioned to experience, and give ourselves the permission to live our lives more fully.
Does this mean we have to be incompetent at being mothers or incompetent at our jobs? Are we then just destined to be stuck between the rock of motherhood and family, and the hard place of having to abandon our personal dreams and ambitions? Did that just sound selfish? No. All it means is we have to do what is best for ourselves and our families. And that, contrary to popular opinion, does not have to involve letting of purpose and personal fulfillment at the altar of perfect service. Or nourish unhappiness and disappointment at the expense of being fully present and appreciative as a working mother.
Because our kids and families want full mothers, happy mothers, purposeful and fulfilled mothers. Mothers who don’t drift through life regretting their dead dreams. Mothers who don’t live burdened by the guilt of not being everything to everyone.Mothers who don’t end up resenting others because they did not get the shot they deserved. Mothers who simply are, instead of merely existing to tackle the next task, the next chore, the next appointment.
Because if we want our kids to live full lives, we must also serve as examples. We must dare to live and tell stories that teach, that inspire, that edify. And guilt has no place in those stories…
Are you dealing with guilt as a working mother? Please email us at corporate@thecorporatesister.com, as we share our stories and encourage each other through our journeys as working moms.
Dear Working Mom is our weekly love letter to working moms everywhere, where we talk about motherhood, life, work and everything in between…
Dear Working Mom,
You’ve been giving of your time and energy as long as you can remember. As a matter of fact, as long as anyone can remember…Subtly, and at times not so subtly, your time has been taken for granted. It’s been assumed that because you carry the load so well, it must not be that heavy. That you can handle the household chores, the kids’ education and care, your elders’ care, your career or business, and so much more, concurrently and well…Even with your partner at home, your load has become increasingly larger and larger, taking up every minute of the day, and most of the time not even allowing you a minute to yourself, to your dreams, to your personal ambitions, to the essence of who you are…
You may find yourself operating in catch-up mode most of the time, repeatedly picking back up what you had to drop to attend to unplanned emergencies, to the kids, or the house…Before you know it, that dream of writing the book, starting your own business, or opening that boutique, has faded in the background of punctual obligations and commitments. Meanwhile, it seems your partner’s time is too valuable to be at the mercy of the same unforgiving demands and requests of family and personal life…It’s made you question your own sense of worth and self-esteem, yet you’ve just kept plugging right along…
And you’re certainly not making this up either…Just in the past few months, according to a study by the Washington University in St Louis, due to the COVID-19 pandemic, working moms have had to reduce their hours by about 5%. As a result, moms also tend to work less hours than dads during this period, and will be more likely to quit their jobs and suffer from mental health consequences. You’ve known the heavy burden you carry is not good for you. You’ve known it for a long time, and may have even started growing resentful because of it…. You may even have started giving voice to your concerns, and started a conversation or two with your partner. There may even have been some progress made, but it may still not be enough…
Could it be that you may have to acknowledge, to yourself first, that your time is as valuable as your partner’s, or anyone else’s for that matter? That the self-sacrificial and worthlessness messages that you, along so many other working moms, have received from society, may have been flawed from the start? That it may start with believing you deserve more, and daring to have the difficult conversations, the challenges to the status quo, and to make the necessary changes to make room for you too?
Your time is valuable. Your time is worth being considered. Your time matters. Just as much as your partner’s…
Disclaimer: Please note some of the links in this post are affiliate links, and I will get paid if you purchase through these links. Thank you!
As a busy mom, the one-piece swimsuit has definitely made a comeback for me in the past few years. Like many, I know first-hand how challenging it can be to find a swimsuit that is practical, comfortable and looks flattering, especially when you’re running after kids and trying to keep it together under the hot sun…
Here are my 10 favorite one-piece swimsuits for busy moms, who want to have it all under the sun (Click on the link and image to be taken to the product):
This teal Abbie one-piece beauty from Modcloth is both supportive and sultry, making it the perfect addition to your next getaway’s wardrobe. Featuring cross-back straps, light ruching, and a padded bust, it’s your perfect pool or beach companion!
The Ruffle Side Stroke – Photo credit: shopstylecollective.com
In a playful mood? This lava and hibiscus-colored, one-sleeve Ruffle Side Stroke swimsuit from Summersalt is fun and chic enough, while still offering supportive cups, for any day out in the sun. Comes in sizes 2 through 22.
Adventure is calling your name with this simple yet daring one-piece Cove stunner from Summersalt! The best part? You can use it as a swimsuit and as a bodysuit too! Available in sizes 2 -22.
The Tiger Plunge – Photo credit: shopstylecollective.com
Sexy and simple is the name of the game with this Tiger Plunge one-piece swimsuit from Nordstrom! A scooped back and notched neckline add to this unique design for va-va-voom swim look! Available in sizes 2-10.
The Sophia – Photo credit: shopstylecollective.com
Vintage-inspired florals turn this classic Sophia piece into a wave-maker and head-turner! You’ll have fun with the eclectic details such as the criss-cross straps, front and back cutouts, and knotted accents. Available from sizes S-XL.
This Oasis stunner from Summersalt is truly an oasis of style and comfort, with its stylish belt added onto an otherwise classic swim silhouette. Available in sizes 2-14.
This Ruffle Backflip one-piece swimsuit will have you make backflips all over the place, with its classic polka dot design spiced up with ruffled sleeves and a deep, but not too deep, neckline. Available from sizes 2-22.
For those of us in need of full coverage like myself, this flamenco one-piece suit is the dream! Featuring a classic bandeau style, soft support, shirring in the waist, and removable, adjustable neck straps, it will keep you in place, and in style! Available in sizes 0-14.
The Reese One-Piece Swimsuit – Photo credit: shopstylecollective.com
Last but not least, this classic Reese one-piece swimsuit bursts with femininity! Elegantly cinched at the waist, ruffled around the neckline and boasting a beautiful print, it’s perfect for a ladylike day at the beach or pool! Available in S-XL.
Ready for a dip in the pool or at the beach? Send us your suggestions at corporate@thecorporatesister.com!
Dear Working Mom is our weekly love letter to working moms everywhere, where we talk about motherhood, life, work and everything in between…
Dear working mom,
You’ve gone through A LOT as a working mother, juggling family, home and work, sometimes all by yourself. Despite the pressure, especially in these times of pandemic, you’ve kept going, pushing through the daily obstacles and walls in your way, resisting the urge to give up, fighting through tears, frustration and overwhelm…Yet, you keep saying yes to requests coming your way, from personal to professional demands on your time and energy, even when you know deep inside you can’t take much more of this pressure…
You’re an undeniable source of support for so many, from your kids, spouse and family, to your friends and colleagues at work. Most people know they can count on you to be there, to do them favors, to pick them up when they fail. You know it too, all too well, so well that it’s become virtually impossible for you to say no. What you also know, all too well, is that you’re sinking under the weight of a to-do list that’s getting longer by the day, and expectations that are becoming heavier by the minute…
You’re overwhelmed, and you’ve been for quite some time. Or is the reality that you’re overextended, over-committed, and in over your head? And that, after all, you’ve been allowing it all along? As a matter of fact, you may even have been deriving some of your worth from it, even getting some sort of a “high” from this feeling of being so indispensable, so crucial to so many…Yet, it’s killing you, literally and figuratively…
In this pandemic season of added, crushing pressure, reeling uncertainty and acute fear, you may be suddenly realizing that instead of waiting for things (and people) to change on their own, you may just be the change you need. That being so against the wall of duty and responsibility, may just be teaching you how much you need to let go of control. That this weight may just be a blessing in disguise, offering you the saving grace of going back to the basics, and letting go of what (and who) stretches you too thin and too far.
At the end of the day, yes, you’re tired, exhausted even, because you’re over-committed. Decide to forgive yourself for not knowing better, for taking on too much, for bravely attempting to be all things to all people. But don’t unpack and stay there. Decide to move forward with a lighter baggage, devoid of others’ overwhelming expectations and demands. Decide to give yourself the grace you’ve so desperately been waiting for others to give you. Be your own kind of change, your own revolution.
Dare to say no, to decline, to ask for what you need. Dare to not be available, to save some of yourself for yourself, and to require that your time and energy be valued and respected. Date to do your own thing, to be your own person, and to let the chips fall where they may.
Last but not least, dare to release the habits, mindsets, beliefs, places, people, that prevent you from reclaiming your wholeness. Dare to take back the pieces of you that you’re going to need to continue and finish your own race. Dare to let go of exhaustion, overwhelm, and over-commitment as badges of honor, because you deserve more…
