This episode is part of our “Black Women at Work” series in honor of Black History Month.
In this episode, I’m exploring how we, as working women and moms, can navigate and combat racial trauma in the workplace.
Listen in!
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Dear Working Mom is our periodic love letter to working moms everywhere, where we deal with and unpack the challenges facing mothers and offer encouragement and support…
Dear Working Mom,
Are you doing too much?
If you’re reading this, you may feel a twinge of anger as you wonder if you really have a choice to do less. Wouldn’t you take the opportunity to lessen your burden if you could? Maybe, but then again, maybe not…
In this modern era, almost post-pandemic era of the “supermom”, the mother who can defiantly do it all, is it possible that working mothers have taken on too much, willingly or not? Is it possible that after all, mothers have resigned themselves to carry an excessive burden that was always too heavy for them? And most importantly, is it still possible to put some of this burden down?
If you could only open your to-do list, and look at it with fresher eyes, with eyes outside of the harsh, demanding, and ultra-competitive reality you’re accustomed to, maybe you could see that not everything on it is truly needed. If you could take the exhaustion you feel in your body and soul, the hint of resentment and anger you experience all too often, as serious signs of imbalance and excess, you could see that what you’ve come to consider as your normal pace is actually burning you out. If you could understand that what the world considers to be a superwoman, a “successful” working mom, is a grossly ridiculous modern exaggeration of women’s and mothers’ roles, then you may be inclined to consider that maybe, only maybe, you are doing way too much…
In between all the ultra-positive messages of female independence and #girlpower, the hyper-visibility of women’s accomplishments, and the transformation of motherhood into a competitive social media-fueled performance, it’s no wonder too many working moms are overwhelmed. It’s also no wonder you feel the all too heavy pressure to do it all at the same time, from breaking the glass ceiling, raising model children, keeping up a spicy partnership, to maintaining the perfect girl squad too…Even as you’re advocating for increased gender equity, adding more action items to your already packed to-do list, you’re carrying burdens that never belonged to you entirely. All the while, you’re signing up for more kids’ activities, volunteering for additional benevolent activities, and trying to keep up with a smile on your face and a paralyzing fear of failing in your heart…
While you certainly have a lot on the various plates you’re juggling, you’re still adding on more, for fear of saying no, disappointing your loved ones, or just not being up to par. The reality is, as much as you have to do, what you don’t have to do is slip into the dangerous trap of excess, whether it’s excessive commitments, demands or challenges…
It may be time to pause and listen to your body, soul and mind, as they first whisper, then start loudly yelling, warning you of impending crisis. These warnings are not a sign of weakness or calls to increase your stamina, as you compare yourself to other working mothers who seem to do it all at all times, in the most flattering Instagram filters too. Instead, they’re nudges to ask yourself: “Am I doing too much?”
Is that extra project absolutely necessary? Are the extra kids’ activities a must? Are the extra volunteering activities on three boards, two parent-teacher associations, plus the neighborhood council indispensable? Is taking on all the grand family holiday celebrations a must?
Are you doing too much? And if so, it’s ok to release all the extra, focus on what truly matters, and breathe again, even if imperfectly so…
This episode is part of our “Black Women at Work” series in honor of Black History Month.
Today, we’re discussing the 7 most common struggles faced by Black women in the workplace. From lack of representation to lack of access to higher levels of management, there are many hurdles in their path. However, shedding light on these allows us to be more educated about these, and also to heal and bring effective solutions and strategies to these issues.
Thanks so much for tuning in and listening to this week’s episode! If you enjoyed this week’s episode, please share it by using the social media at the bottom of this post!
Also, leave me a review for the TCS podcast on Apple Podcasts !
In academics as well as the professional sphere, Black women have been conditioned to operate in excellence for the longest time. There is a badge of honor that comes with always showing up in your optimal capacity, especially if and when you’re the “only” Black woman in the room, the department, at this or that level, or in the company as a whole. The traditional saying according to which Black women have to work twice as hard to achieve the same, or lesser results, than their counterparts, has and still is, holding true for many Black women in the workplace…
However, with the advent of the COVID-19 pandemic and the racial reckoning that has accompanied it, it is a reality that is increasingly starting to fade out. As the glaring gender, race and class inequalities are rearing their ugly heads, inflamed by the repercussions of a global health crisis shaking the very foundations of our society, women in general, and Black women in particular are questioning the legitimacy and necessity of a narrative aimed at glorifying an ideal of excellence rarely rewarded in kind by the advancement, growth and progress it was always supposed to create.
Excellence, for the sake of it, is certainly a noble pursuit to aspire to. For many, Black Excellence has served as a tool of empowerment. However, unrecognized, demeaned and even questioned excellence drastically diminishes its intended impact and effects. The point of making it into once restricted rooms, once secret conversations, and into once segregated systems, is to birth opportunities for change, growth and progress. When these opportunities are stifled and compressed, status quo not only remains, it grows stronger by the sheer compounding effect of the unrecognized effort and the barriers in place. All in all, it becomes an even harsh reminder of the barriers still standing in the way of gender and race equity for all.
? How can this be when Black women are graduating at higher rates than their male counterparts, and entering the workforce in larger numbers? How can Black excellence result in such dismal representation at lower and higher levels of management alike?
These are just some of the questions at the tip of the Black Excellence iceberg that is prompting many a Black woman to divest from it, and even begin to embrace mediocrity, which for many Black women has long been associated with lack of opportunity. What was hailed as a protection against unfairness and bias, is increasingly being experienced and seen as too costly a badge of honor to carry. One that may unwittingly reduce the lives of those who strive for it, to exceptionalism that may not be necessarily fulfilling, rather than true meaning, purpose, and even sanity.
More and more, the question is being raised as to whether or not measuring Black women’s worth through what is traditionally being defined as “exceptionalism” is still valid? Is being a CEO or high-tech executive in a non-diverse environment the real definition of exceptional success, or one that needs to be re-visited to expand more inclusive definitions of what success may look like across gender and race spaces? Maybe true excellence is about fulfilling a career and life of meaning on our own terms, inclusive of our different identities and aspirations, making it a welcoming space of growth rather than an enclosed trap of traditional expectations…
In the world of entrepreneurship, funding is a vital source of growth. However, for many, if not most female entrepreneurs, it’s also a major obstacle. As a matter of fact, one third of the world’s female entrepreneurs face gender bias when attempting to raise capital for their businesses, according to HSBC Private Banking’s research. Women face the most gender bias in the UK, the United States and Singapore. Further research shows female-led ventures are at a greater disadvantage when raising funds for businesses in male-dominated fields as opposed to female-dominated ones.
As the COVID-19 pandemic has resulted in a large number of businesses created by women entrepreneurs, it has also predominantly negatively affected the latter. Faced with the scarcity of funding opportunities for women entrepreneurs, several lenders and corporations are lending a hand to help reduce disadvantages experienced by women entrepreneurs. As such, these organizations are offering help and support to female entrepreneurs by making these 15 small business grants available:
This business grant program through Visa is dedicated to Black women-owned businesses. In order to qualify for this grant, applicants must be Black women business owners for at least two years, be a business-to-consumer company, and reach a minimum revenue of $24,000. Specific location restrictions also apply.
This grant is directed at female entrepreneurs planning to start a local small business. To apply for this grant, all that is required is for the applicant to explain their business’ purpose. One women-owned business is selected each month to receive a $10,000 grant. In addition, one of the monthly winners is then selected at the end of the year to receive a $25,000 grant.
Through this initiative, FedEx engages the public to vote for the business of their choice. Candidates who receive the most vote win a $75,000 grant. To sweeten the pot, the winner also benefits from free exposure through FedEx’s media outlets.
This grant allows prospective women-owned businesses to be eligible for a federal government grant for research and development needs. In order to qualify, female-led businesses must employ fewer than 500 employees. Eligible businesses can receive over $750,000 if the research produces positive outcomes.
Speaking of research and development needs, the Small Business Innovation Research grant applies to female-owned businesses boasting cutting-edge ideas. Eligible companies can earn a $150,000 grant, and can receive up to $1 million in the span of two years
For any women-owned businesses whose mission is focused on furthering the cause of women and girls, grants are made available from the Ms Foundation for Women. Examples of businesses who have benefited from these grants include businesses advocating for affordable childcare, against domestic violence, and for reproductive health, to cite a few examples.
The Cartier Women’s Initiative Award is bestowed upon 21 female entrepreneurs each year by Cartier. As a prize, winners get one-on-one expert coaching, media coverage, as well as business workshops, in addition to other rewards ranging from $30,000 to $100,000.
These 7 business grants for women entrepreneurs, among others, are a good start to begin the process of helping women-owned businesses overcome the barriers in their way.
