As working women, we tend to wear many “working hats”. From caring for our families to juggling demanding careers, it can be easy to get caught in a whirlwind of activities. Especially as working moms, slipping into the sea of commitments, appointments, and obligations can become a daily occurrence, until we start thriving to work on purpose…
As I grew in my career and became a mom, I found myself increasingly lost in the midst of everything I had to attend to. It seemed as if I were always working. If I were not working at work, I’d be working at home on my second or third (or even fourth sometimes) shift. While I was clearly being busier than productive, the purpose of all I was doing, especially my work, was also lost to me. I was working to make money to pay the bills, and caring for my family as best as I could. Yet, there were many times when I asked myself: “Is this all there is? Why am I really doing all this?”, and “What is really my purpose in all this?”
I’m sure you may have asked yourself the same question many times over, at one point or another of your career or life. Most of us have. In a world that’s busier by the minute, even taking the time to think has to be scheduled way ahead of time. Yet, this lack of direction and purpose created by constant busy-ness is not just costing us our health and sanity. It’s also preventing us from doing our best work and living our best life.
A significant part of my growth as an individual and working woman has been centered around learning to work and live more on purpose. By this, I mean striving to be more intentional about what I do and how I do it. This process has thankfully brought me to change careers, alter my mindset, and even start exercising on an almost daily basis. It has been, and still is, a challenging process, as I’m tempted daily to sink into the dangerous pit of busy-ness and mindless achievement. Yet, with the help of mentors, through my faith and lots of trial and error, I’ve slowly come to laying manageable steps to work and live more on purpose as a working woman and working mom. Here’s what has worked for me, in 7 simple but not-so-simple iterations:
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Start with the “Why”
“Why am I doing this?” This seemingly simple question has become one of my absolute go-to’s in everything, or at least almost everything, I start. Very often, we can start processes and experiences without knowing why we’re even engaged in them. From picking jobs and careers that are ill-fitted to our personalities and desires, to marrying the wrong man and choosing destructive friendships, we may waste precious time as a result of missing the “why” behind our decisions.
Why did you pick the job? Why are you entertaining these relationships? Why are you completing the degree? All these questions are not only necessary, but crucial to picking a direction in line with your purpose.
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Develop a love affair with yourself
I had to fall back in love with myself, and embrace who I was created to be, before I could even begin working and living on purpose. Too many outside opinions, pieces of advice and external considerations had me going in personal and professional trajectories I wasn’t happy or fulfilled with.
Learning to know myself, what works for me and what doesn’t, what excites me and sets me on fire, has allowed me to walk away from jobs, careers and relationships that weren’t for me. It’s also helped me enter fields and develop relationships that bring me so much joy and fulfillment.
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Learn your limitations and challenge them
However, this is not just about fostering a love affair with yourself and the world. It’s also about discovering your own perceived limits and challenging them to the best of your ability. Many, if not most times, these limitations, whether real or perceived, keep us from being more intentional and purposeful in our work and lives.
For me, working on purpose also involved facing my fear of public speaking. It means not just putting myself out there, but also learning the necessary tools and getting the right mentorship to become better at it.
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Create a network that works for you
It takes a village to build a purposeful and intentional career and life. This is why it’s so important to build a network around you. Not just any network, but a network that works for you and fits your own life and career.
It took me a while to build the right networks for me. Getting over my fear to network, and then finding networks that feel like home, allowed me to really strive in my work and life.
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Worry about fit more than appearances
Working on purpose is also a matter of knowing, and applying, what works for you. This is where the right fit comes in. What work fits you best? What type of environment fits you best? What work-life integration is best for you?
For me, it was a matter of understanding the best fit for me in terms of careers, locations and work-life integration. In turn, it helped me transition careers and lifestyles in a way that works best for me.
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Cherish the process
Working and living more intentionally also requires trusting and cherishing the process. The longer I resented and resisted the process, the longer it took.
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Release control
Last but not least, release excess control on the outcomes of your career and life decisions. There is a large part of our own individual processes that requires us to let go. I’ve learnt to do my best and release the outcome.
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To Your Success,
The Corporate Sis.
