Grieving at work – madamenoire.com

Happy Tuesday!

When Death knocks on the door of Life, there is not much any of us can do. As much as life goes on, and we all have to make do with the reality of the absence of a loved one, it’s still a process that is made easier and more difficult at the same time by the everyday occupations and distractions we all have to partake in, like…work!

As driven, corporate sisters, we also are emotional human beings, and dealing with the loss of a loved one and finding the strength to go back to work and keep carrying on with our professional responsibilities is at times beyond imaginable. And that is when we can even take time off, as bereavement leave is not necessarily required by the Fair Labor Standards Act or the Family Medical Leave Act.

As comforting as it may be to share our grief with co-workers and managers, not all workplaces may be open to it. Less friendly workplaces cast a negative light on so-called “excessive displays of emotion” at work, and expect the same level of professionalism from individuals who’ve just been through traumatic and life-altering circumstances. In addition, for many of us, the pressures of “keeping it together” to sustain our families or even just to save appearances and not disappoint, put us at risk of not processing our emotions properly and failing to grieve in a healing, redemptive manner.

Yet, as “unfriendly” or supportive as some corporate environments may be, we have to find ways to cope with grief while still upholding the highest of professional standards at work, and without losing our sanity in the process:

• Take time off if you can! If your workplace allows for time off, take the allotted time to grieve! I used to work with a successful corporate sister who would not allow herself to take more than the afternoon off when her dad passed, because there was so much work to do and she needed the distraction. However, what she failed to notice is that her lack of grieving turned into a full-blown depression a few months later. So even if you’re not sure how to process your pain, take the time off!

• Talk about it at work! As counter-intuitive as this may sound for some of us, even in less friendly workplaces, talking about your grief and experience can make a world of difference! In more supportive environments, your manager and co-workers may be able to provide comfort and alleviate some of your work burden. Even in less supportive workplaces, simply communicating your availability will help avoid painful misunderstandings.

• Be kind to yourself! In a corporate culture that is all about going, going, going, we often forget as corporate sisters to slow down and take care of ourselves first. Especially when our own sanity and ability to produce results depends so much on it…Exercise, meditate, drink water, even when all you want to do is curl up on the couch or get distracted with that next project at work. Nurture your body and soul, and find a quiet place and time in the midst of the craziness to call your own…Your mind and body will thank you, and so will your career…

Ever experienced grief in the workplace? How did you cope with it?

The Corporate Sister.